一月 2007

我的两个女朋友终于都进了稳定的事业单位。
但是她们说她们不开心。进去之前，两个人都哭了。一个痛哭了整个晚上，眼睛红肿；一个在夕阳下的摇椅上，静静地泪流满面。
她们说，我进了你逃出的牢。

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Today I hurt myself at work. Still, because promised uncle to work after working in the café, I had to tow my painful feet struggling to his bakery and continued worked. He rejected to give me the 900 hours work experience prove if I do not actually for enough time. And once again, he said my English is too poor to serve customers. That is why I feel pretty unhappy working there. They do not treat you like a coworker and give you the respect you deserve. No matter how hard you work and how much progress you achieve, they would always find something dissatisfied and blame you. I don’t like the way they blame without consideration. Once, twice, regarding of their ages and my nonproficiency at the beginning, I can bear them. But feel more and more depressed now.
Today when he mentioned my poor English once again I nearly cried. I am frustrated. Why should I stay here doing this humble and hard manual work, standing up all these sneers and hurts? I really feel tired. But no way to way to escape. I can not draw back.
I often call my mum when I feel bad. However, as Zhang Ailing said, the mum I call is not the real mum, it is just a protective roll in my imagination. A shelter.

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Last night is the last night of 2006.

I went to city to watch the magnificent fireworks. It was a New Year gift for me myself.

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